I can’t believe it’s been a whole week since I posted. Work is vying for my attention. But I am going to stay focused; on the riding, eating 2000 times a day and blogging about it. I made a commitment to myself. If I can’t keep commitments to myself, what good am I to any one? Weigh-in this morning, 166lbs pre-ride, 165lbs post-ride. This is a very big milestone for me today. According to my goal chart, I am supposed to be at 158.5lbs. 6.5lbs off track. I was supposed to be at 165lbs on June 8th. That’s 3 weeks off track. Sad, I didn’t stay on track. But I will focus on the positive. I’m not 175lbs or even 170lbs.
I remember the last time I weighed 165lbs. I thought I’d never get back to this. It’s disheartening in a way, because 165lbs on me is fat. And that is so unnecessary. I never should have let it get this out of hand. But, it is what it is. Now I want to focus my energy on losing the weight.
Hey, this will be fun… how about gross fat pictures of me I’m too scared to post anywhere else??? Sure, there is no humility left once you’ve blogged to the world about your fatness. Why not!
This was me in May 2009. 180lbs, largest I’ve ever been in my whole life. It was 88` that day, really hot. But I was safe, cuz I had my fat clothes on. Long sleeves & long pants. Baggy & dark coloured. It is my hope that I never get to this weight again in my life.
(oh, and for all you ‘calories in – calories burned=weight loss’ dummies: That is me, eating 1800 calories a day & riding 175 miles a week. The only thing that has enabled me to lose the weight is the meds I’m on. Kinda blows yer little formula all to hell, eh??)
This is me during the Tour De Cure May 2008. 173lbs, not a pretty sight. So to those of you still arguing with me that I’m not fat, here’s the proof!
This is me riding the MS150 in 2006. 161lbs. That was back when I thought THIS was fat! Who knew it would get worse. Wow, look at how thin Guy was then…
The positive. There are clothes in my closet I have not worn in a long time that now will fit me. A whole group of ‘fat’ clothes I bought when I first became fat. I haven’t been able to wear them until now because I was too big. Making some progress. It’s little steps, and I am thankful to God for each one of them he grants me.. This is cool. And look what else I found in my closet this morning: 
Not only did I find it, I also used it. See the ‘fat-girl’ impressions on the carpet??? I did core training. 1 five-set, 25 repititions group. And 1 one-minute plank. It was amazing!
I think it may have been last week I said I was going to start strength & core training. I have to find some time tonight to do my shoulder workout. This is one of the last habits I need to build. Remember back here: Habits. I have to find a way to make weight training doable. I already enjoy it alot, but I haven’t been able to get started with it again. Post up a comment if you have any idea what it may be.
I had an epiphany last week. But it’s such a big one, I haven’t had time to write about it. Maybe later this week…
What…what is that thing in the closet?? A stair stepper??
On the actual post content I just have to say that reading other people’s stories and where they are in their own life journeys really just brings home to me how different all of us really are; even in how we perceive ourselves and the world around us.
And an my own subjective view: I love that picture on the wall!
the area and your pose and yes YOU are beautiful. Not that my statement is at all necessary to validate your worth; since it totally isn’t. Just saying…another case of different perspectives.
It’s an ab roller, my guide to core training. Although my clients would not allow me the freedom of core training this week. Maybe next week…
Thanks for seeing my beauty. Like I told you before, April, I have been beautiful all of my adult life. Even with the added weight, the world still finds me beautiful, the world still accepts me. But they do not see the inner beauty that developed thru the pain I’ve suffered. As I’m sure they did not see the beauty I saw when I first stumbled onto your sight.
You have such great energy & love, and beauty. Please don’t lose sight of that…
I’m sure you don’t need some moron like me to state the obvious of how beautiful you are. And better a crunch bar than Nestles crunch bar. I must become a terrible bore, but the more I study obesity the more complex it becomes.
Endocrine disfunction obesity appears to be related to creation of fat from carbohydrates that no matter how heroically one adheres to a limited diet they just go on manufacturing excess fat. Obesity of the endocrine type may have its origin in any one of four glands, namely thyroid, gonadal, pituitary or thymus.
The following are excerpts from ScienceDaily (May 15, 2008)
——While eating too much and exercising too little are still considered the major cause of obesity, scientists have recently started investigating whether chemicals known as endocrine disruptors, which mimic or alter the effects of hormones in the body, could also play a role in making people fat.
In a special session at the European Congress on Obesity supported by the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences (NIEHS) in the USA and the Swiss National Science Foundation, experts reported new evidence that mice exposed to endocrine disrupting chemicals during pregnancy – at levels either comparable to or approaching those that humans are exposed to – produced offspring that became fat as adults and had altered gene and metabolic functions involved in regulating weight.
“The findings from these studies suggest that susceptibility to obesity is developed in the womb or early in life and that exposure to a variety of common household chemicals can, probably along with fetal nutrition, play a role in increasing that susceptibility,” said Jerry Heindel of the US National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences, an expert in the field, who was unconnected with the studies highlighted at the conference.
Bisphenol A, or (BPA) an ingredient in polycarbonate plastics. Past research has found evidence that it leaches from plastic food containers and bottles, from plastic wrap and from the resin that lines food cans.
perfluorooctanoic acid (PFOA) – a greaseproofing agent used in scores of products from microwave popcorn bags to pizza box liners and other food containers
Tributylin is used in boat paint, in plastic food wrap and as a fungicide on crops and has been found to leach into food.——
These three chemicals are newly being studied as part of the problem. There studies show only effect on the fetus or young. They can’t possibly know whether these or thousands of other cemicals that have been introduced in the last century flip some metobolic switch later on in life. My own lifetime isn’t long enough to wait for the millions of other studies that should be conducted.
I’m inclined to believe that most logical approach is to eat foods as closely as possible as the Good Lord created them. I think your method of excluding certain foods, to create a sort of metabolic equalibrium then reintroducing that item to see how your body reacts is agood one.
Only now we think it may not only be foods but other contaminents as well. I mean, we can’t possibly know whether or not for example millions of people doing the right thing to control their wight, working out at the gym drinking bottled water from certain types of plastic were in the process of altering their metabolism to become obese at some later point. And then there is always the profit motive of one group or another that may cloud the issue.
I guess the best answer is to stop eating. I must have way too much time on my hands. Here is another new tidbit (suddenly I’m in the mood for fish???)
Washington Post, April 22, 2009 -
‘More than 80 percent of the male smallmouth bass in the Potomac River are growing eggs, but after six years of searching, scientists still have not pinned down the pollutants that are causing the abnormality.’
I think now is a good time to cut bass from my diet.
Sansom – excellent information. I know it has to be more than ‘calories consumed- calories burned=weight loss’.
There are so many people out there that have given good, true attempts at limiting food intake while exercising and not seeing any real change at all.
I strongly beleive they are not doing the ‘right’ things because the information we have available to us is incorrect, hyped and corrupted.
The increase in obesity in the last 50 years is a true, measureable fact. Something must have happened in how we process foods, the chemicals we are exposed to & the genetic-altered food we consume that has played a role in this.
Our doctors have to take some responsibility in so many people being unable to effectively lose weight. As I have said before, many of them profess knowledge they do not have. They do not listen to us or spend enough time concentrating on what is wrong or why we are having weight problems even though we are dieting & exercising.
The fish story deeply saddened me. I love fish. You mentioned profit motive. We really do need to pay attention to the weight-loss industry, billions of dollars being spent. Most of the products & information do NOTHING for weight loss. It’s all just costly hype. I believe we listen to it because we have grown weary. We have ceased to truly think for ourselves. And we are too poisoned by bad foods to have the energy to do anything different, so we drift along….